Closing can be a big deal.

Buying or selling a home involves establishing a relationship.

If you are the buyer, you are in control but only to the degree of your contract. I have been involved in contract negotiations that take weeks to resolve with a true meeting of the minds. But even the toughest negotiations can result in smooth transactions.

Negotiations are not just about price, yet price is the most important aspect for both parties. Buyers may ask that the seller assist with closing costs. Buyers may ask for an earlier closing date because of issues with mortgage interest rates and lock-in requirements. As a result, the final price can hinge on closing date. Communication is the key to creating a good relationship throughout the transaction.

The buyer has the right to inspections to determine if the home is in the condition expected. An inspector is hired by the buyer, and this inspector spends many hours in the seller's home. Uncomfortable as it is, this is truly a protective measure for both buyer and seller. The buyer typically has the right to cancel the contract if the condition of the property is not acceptable.

Often buyers get bogged down with numerous insignificant items rather than the true picture of the overall condition of the property. Roofing, electrical and plumbing systems, air conditioning and heating systems are critical.

Many other issues -- such as tree limbs close to the home and minor caulking -- are maintenance items that buyers can expect to deal with throughout the time they own the home.

Buying a house is very different than purchasing an appliance or another item that does not carry the same emotion. It's like buying a car from a private owner, rather than a dealer. If the buyer values the seller's "pride of ownership," the transaction can proceed smoothly. When a buyer boasts of all the changes he or she will make to the home, some emotions may arise from the seller that can affect the ease of the transaction.

The bottom line is, if sellers and buyers appreciate each others' viewpoint, and the struggles that go along with buying, selling and moving entire households, the transaction can be a pleasant one for all.

When sellers and buyers have proceeded through all the stages of the purchase and a good relationship has been established, sellers will leave information that is not required but very helpful for the buyer. Paint, extra keys, names of neighbors, warranty books, repairmen and other great information can ease the process for a buyer and make the move a good one.

A buyer and seller may not even meet each other until the closing, but the relationship was established throughout the transaction in the manner in which each party deals with the unexpected changes.

Relationships . . . try for the best when buying a home.